深夜福利影视-深夜福利影院-深夜福利影院在线-深夜福利影院在线观看-深夜福利在线播放-深夜福利在线导航-深夜福利在线观看八区-深夜福利在线观看免费

【nsfw sex video tumblr】Enter to watch online.How to Throw Your Video Game Controller

【nsfw sex video tumblr】Enter to watch online.How to Throw Your Video Game Controller

Video games are a lot of fun, but they can also be frustrating. From time to time, you may even get frustrated enough that you want to throw something. Good news! Your controller is right there in your hand.

I've often heard people refer to a game as "controller-throwingly difficult." This is an evocative description, but it only tells part of the story. Video games are not defined according to a throw/no-throw binary. They exist along a spectrum of frustration. Likewise, there are many degrees of video game controller-throw.

With help from illustrator Kevin Whipple, I have outlined a collection of the most common techniques. They are arranged in order of escalation.

1. The Shake

Shake the controller forcefully but keep it safely in hand. Carefully set it down and take a break. Alternately, mash all the buttons for about one second instead of shaking.

2. The Almost Slam

Raise the controller up in anger. Start to bring it down on a surface in front of you, then catch yourself short and firmly set it down instead.

3. The Slam

This time, do not catch yourself. Slam the controller onto your desk or coffee table, not quite hard enough to break anything.

4. The Triple Slam

Briskly slam your controller onto the desk or coffee table three times, then firmly set it down in disgust. There is no double slam. You will either slam once or three times. Low to moderate chance of damage.

5. The Couch Toss

Exasperatedly toss the controller to your side and onto the couch. Do so with the understanding that the couch will cushion the blow. Low chance of damage. Can lead to an accidental second phase if your controller bounces off the couch and onto the floor, with a higher chance of damage.

6. The Floor Toss

Exasperatedly toss the controller onto floor, rather than the couch. The couch is too good for your controller. It deserves to be on the floor. Moderate chance of damage.

7. The Wall Pitch

Perform a direct overhand pitch into the wall. High chance of damage.

8. The Screen Pitch

Perform a direct overhead pitch at your television screen, aiming for whatever boss or other challenge it was that most recently defeated you. Medium chance of controller damage. High chance of television damage.

9. The Whole Enchilada

Throw your controller at the television, then get up and rip your console out of the entertainment center and throw that, too. Pull all the cables out through your entertainment center and throw them over your shoulder. Root out the disease. Root it out.

10. The Regan MacNeil

Throw your controller directly into your console, knocking it to the floor. Walk over and, while standing, projectile vomit directly onto the console until it stops working.

11. The Budd

Build a tiny controller-sized coffin. Get a shovel and drive to an isolated spot several miles out of town. Dig a small, deep hole. Put a fresh set of batteries into your controller and turn it on. Place your controller inside the coffin and bury it alive.

12. The Eggo

Use your telekinetic powers to lift the entire console apparatus into the air, then slam it into the wall. Hold it in place as you can summon the force of will to blast it into the dark oblivion of an alternate dimension.

13. The Full Heisenberg

Withdraw all the money from your savings account and stack it on top of the controller, then set it on fire. As you breathe in the smoke, conference call your boss and significant other and tell them both to go fuck themselves. Calmly walk from your house as the fire spreads to the carpet and drapes. Take a photo of the blaze from the street and post it to social media with no added description or context. Drop your phone into the nearest drainage hole, pick a direction, and start walking.

I hope this guide has helped you find the controller throw that's right for you. And remember, if you're feeling frustrated, you can always take a break! That boss fight will be there when you get back.

Illustrations by Kevin Whipple

Latest Updates

主站蜘蛛池模板: 高潮又爽又黄又无遮挡免费软件 | 国产麻豆剧传媒精品国产免费 | 国产98色在线 | 国产午夜毛片v一区二 | 国产原创中文精品经理篇 | 成人无码免费看 | 91人妻人人做人碰人人爽九色 | 国产激情一区二区三区在线观看 | 国产午夜福利一区在线观看 | 国产sm影院在线观看 | 国产制服精品一区二区视色 | 国产女装大佬在线看视频 | 动漫处女自慰日韩一区二区 | av传媒视频窝窝影院午夜看片 | 国产互换人妻好紧hd无码 | 国产精品视频福利一区二区 | 精品熟女少妇aⅴ免费久久 精品熟女少妇av | aa片一区二区三区 | av一区二区 | va一区二区三区 | 韩国日本亚洲欧洲一区二区三 | 国产精品无码一区二区三级 | 91精品国产免费自 | 99精品众筹模| 高清日韩热门电影免费手机在线观看 | 97精品人妻一区二区三区在线 | 91福利国产在线观看香蕉 | 国产一区二区免费不卡在线播放 | 成人无码电影一区二区三区 | 91三级在线日韩精品片 | 国产白浆一区二区三区 | 精品国产午夜福利在线观看 | 国产欧美久久久久久精品四区 | 91大神精品无码在线观看 | 黑人巨大精品欧美一区二区 | 国产日韩亚洲中文在线 | 国产在线观看精品不卡 | 国产原创在线观看播放 | 国产黄色片在线播放 | 成人欧美一区二区三区视频 | 国产区香蕉精品系列在线观看不 |