Today in footwear we never asked for: Crocs presents its Cyprus V heels.

This unfashionable pair of heels looks as though a set of Crocs was planted in soil,prime video sex stories placed in direct sunlight, and grown into something much worse than the original. And they can be yours for the low price of $224.77! Isn't that fantastic? (The company has much more affordable ugly heels on its website.)

The heels come in black or a fun "Platinum/Wild Orchid" option if you're feeling adventurous, and they're made from the classic Crocs Croslite material, with that same synthetic sole you know and love.

As far as unusual Crocs (or Croc-inspired shoes) go, these are far from the weirdest. There've been tube-sock Crocs, furry Crocs, and even platform Crocs modeled on the runway for Balenciaga.

If you're dying to upgrade your Crocs game from the classic flat slingback to big plastic heels, you'd better move fast because they're nearly sold out on Amazon.

Look, we don't really understand either, but that's 2018 for ya.

[H/T: Cosmopolitan]